The hair loss

I was diagnosed with breast cancer at the start of April, and I’m surprised that it’s taken me until the end of October to write about hair loss. It’s one of the first things you think of when you hear the words cancer and chemotherapy, right? But I didn’t want to write about it until…

The bittersweet birthdays

Last week, Joseph turned three. And then three days later, my sister’s son Louie turned five. Consequently, we had three days packed with cake and jelly and boundless excitement. A theme park, a party and a whole lot of presents. Because Paul was away and it was a nursery day, we celebrated Joseph’s birthday a…

The perception shift

I’ve been feeling quite down about my sister Rachel’s situation lately. We had some amazing, rapid progress a few weeks ago, when she started to speak and to eat. I have a messaging group with her close friends and there was a time when it seemed that every day, someone had witnessed her doing something…

The final chemo

I can’t know for sure that my sixth chemo was the last one I’ll ever have. I’ve come across too many women lately who’ve been through this more than once to take anything for granted. But it’s the final one for now; a door gently closed. Because Elodie had been projectile vomiting on and off…

The fifth chemo

The night before my fifth chemo, Elodie put in her best night’s sleep in weeks. And of course, Joseph somehow got wind of this and gave us his worst. At 3am, I woke up to find him sitting on the floor at the foot of our bed. ‘What are you doing?’ I asked. ‘I’m just…

The letter to my children

To my son and my daughter, I am going to do everything I can to overcome this cancer and spend the next forty or fifty years with you. To this end, I am having poison pumped into my body that steals my energy and my hair. I am having parts of my body cut off…